EMO.NOT

2012-01-26T22:51:00.004+08:00

this year I had a super awesome cny! (:
somehow I feel even closer to my cousins and
that makes cny with them super enjoyable ^^
I think that's cos everyone has grown a little,
including the little ones used to be irritating HAHA.

I still think it's cool to be so close to my maternal extended family!
*doing my readings for ssa now, that's what I really hate about arts mod :/

anyway had a long talk with gor gor last night on the way home..
I wanna get my red Mini Cooper! ^^ hahaha first time he's supportive of my decision.
but first up I need to get my license?????!!! too damn lazy

I've been super pms-y though, especially towards some people.
I think it's quite unfair for them because I think it started because I lost my bb ):
my poor blackberry! I'll buy it back from you, Mr/Miss Pickpocket.
sad to think that I lost all the retarded/funny whatsapp photos inside,
they make me laugh everytime during my boring solo train rides.
and also I lost the songs that yc sang!
you can build new memories, but they can never be the same as your old one,
because people change, things change too, nothing can ever be the same.

been having major headache every single day,
maybe a spidy is building a huge web inside my brain ):

STEAMBOAT AGAIN TMR ^^

2012-01-19T21:18:00.006+08:00

somehow I have to look the youngest among us WHEN I'M THE OLDEST.

^^ I get to go home tmr!!!! *dorky dance of happiness*
survived 2 weeks of school! 15 weeks more to gooooo (:
time passes really fast huh! this sem I'm a multilingual kid ^^
Bahasa Indo + Chinese history + Anatomy (Latin) :D
it's going to keep me busy for the whole sem!
but I've so many things to look forward to during Summer (:

I've this extremely evil idea ^^
if I dislike someone I shall be damn nice to that person,
& always bake for him/her to eat and add extra butter and everything,
& make that person grow fat. like a xiao pang :D
alright maybe it's not even that's evil but still.. quite an idea!

& I'm back to making cards again, which is really awesome because t hey are so nice!
you knw why? because I think since the world might end this year,
it will be everybody's last birthday! well, so I wanna make them feel special ^^
I wish I can be more artsy fartsy! AND I FOUND THIS IN MY ART STASH!

when I was still vvv crazy over Goong & him!

he xin nian zhu xin nian xin nian ah, nian nian nian~
paoz zhu sheng sheng chiu ren xiang you nian~~
I've a few Chinese New Year songs ringing in my head,
since when did I become so.. Cheena??
but it's good anyway ANGPAONALAI ^^
last year cny I took a photo with.. (_____)
I miss being eighteen )':

2012-01-19T01:30:00.004+08:00

x Baby you light up my world like nobody else x

This picture is up simply because the girl is really cute,

I always regret taking naps at night because the end result is this ):
dislike being awake when it's beyond 1 o'clock!

I think my energy is being drained pretty badly..
you knw something's wrong when you're sleeping 9hours a day but you're forever tired.
*sleep eyes zZz* but it's okay tmr will be good I hope!
in school 10-6 but only having 3 hours of lesson HOW HORRIBLE IS THAT?

## tell me if time should make a change,
then why do I feel the same?

I WANT THE CAP IT FITS ME PERFECTLY. (!!!!!!!)

love, when someone remembers something that I like &&

2012-01-14T00:39:00.005+08:00

soooooo tired ): I think I get this feeling every school day!
which isn't that bad because I'll get to sleep early,
and be a healthy girl ^^ hehe sleep before 12 wake up before 7!
it's okay, PAIN IS TEMPORARY PRIDE IS FOREVER.

I had field trip today! felt like a p1 kid hehee ^^
we went Kent Ridge park to look at plants,
but some insects popped by to say Hello!
like Mr Big-head Caterpillar who sticked onto Bill's shirt and refused to leave,
Mr Huge-ass Spider waiting for his pray to cohabitat with him in his golden web,
Mr/Mrs/baby bats and their poopoo! heeheehee.
I think Shab will just cry on the spot when she sees these little babies!
it was fun! soooo much beter than streaking bacteria on an agar plate )':

needs to make Sugar Sucre for cny.. since when is baking becoming a chore?

oh today I cooked reaaaaally nice lunch!
Baked salmon with impromptu cream (cheese?) sauce,
cheesemushroom & butter-tomatoes & sweet potatoes!
with Peach & Apricot tea hehe ^^ likka professional~

2012-01-11T20:17:00.007+08:00

3rd day of school! been having headaches everyday ):
I think 8hours of lesson a day is really a little overwhelming..
but I guess I just need some time to adjust to it!
after all I survive 2 years in Hwach hehehe ^^

after a gooooood long talk with my gorgor,
I think I finally decide what I really want in life.
sometimes, you're not permitted to do what you like to do,
but you knw you tried. so maybe you should just complete what you're doing,
then proceed with the next stage of life? after all you've spent time on it,
sooooo just do it and get something in return first (:
I think that theory is agreeable ^^ (: Thank you & ILY! ♥

Sometimes, having a brother is even better than having a superhero ^^

#we're happy as long as you're happy, no matter what decision you make,
we will just support you in whatever way we can (':

went back to Hwach for ZJM but.. they didn't have it )':
the cute auntie felt so apologetic she gave us extra Wantons!
with these people I feel like a kid all over again ^^

Kithing! (: I like, I like 'road trip's to nice places to chill,
makes me feel like I've all the time in the world to waste!
love having the luxury to just walk around, eat & talk (:
with a person that I really treasure!

Shab's birthday! childish girl turned 20 but.. her maturity level,

well, shall not be disclosed ^^ but I love you all the same anyway!

I'm really exhausted, yes it's that bad my brain is basically drained everyday )':
I can't wait for cny's steamboaaaaaaat ^^ the really yummy soup!

2012-01-02T21:49:00.002+08:00

Been busy.. growing fat )':

just lazing around, spending time with people & all!
when I'm @ home I spend time.. 9gagging HAHAHA.
but going out is definitely burning a big big hole in my wallet..
and also creating a big big tummy, been eating so much!
January is here! hehehe ^^ new month = allowance, just like awesome payday!

& Chinese New Year is coming! which means more $$$$$.
alright this is horrible, I sound like a spendthrift but.. I'm not!
I'm pretty good with finance management imho,
should have studied accountancy or something JUST KIDDING.
& I really love updating my passbook! that's a really weird fetish :O

*to you two: I like how you responded the same way as me just now towards ____
it means the world to me, I love you xx.

I've the sudden urge to travel.. to somewhere far!
I wanna go to Glasgow :D Prague or.. Mallorca.
'traveling alone' shall be on my to-d0-list,
I think it's pretty cool to do it once in your life!
after all, you're the truest to yourself aren't you?

been thinking about it a little bit,
maybe just maybe, I should be less emotionless,
or maybe learn to put in more feelings into things.
quote: sometimes you're just too calm, it's scary.
it has never been a problem to me, it's all about being myself,
irregardless of how people think about it.

sometimes it feels so hard to let people walk into your lives,
I dnt knw if it's about being self-centered or just.. too tired to open the door.
'I am happy being like this' means the world to me.
so I guess if you do not know how it feels to be like me,
you can just keep your opinions to yourself? (:

Sometimes I think I'm getting more quiet, it's scary.
I used to like being the center of attraction, talking a lot,
talking loudly, being noisy, etc etc.
but now I think I just need more private time with myself,
doing things myself or just, with people I really trust ^^
I used like having fun with people I dnt really knw very well,
but now it gets harder, somehow.
I feel that I'm not as fun as I used to be and it's scary.
well if this is a part about growing up, it scares me pretty much,

I've facing some issues, uh oh. (not sure if they are good or bad..)

2011-12-25T16:07:00.004+08:00

snowflakes are so pretty xx.

busy cooking/baking for tonight's (':
I shall update this abit while steaming my caramel pudding!
just in case Larrie complains that I dnt update, HELLO LARRIE.
well sometimes I really wonder who actually reads this boring stuff.

#It's not about following your heart and it's not about keeping your promises. It's about security.

Young, so young.

Chuinyan: I see your patience level has skyrocketed :D

true to a certain extent! I think I utillize my free time pretty well!
I think it's all because of the smiles I see on people
after they eat whatever crap I cook/bake! heeheehee ^^
A asked me to start a food blog! because I chuck my recipes everywhere..
so I might as well record it down somewhere hehehe.

Merry X'mas!

eating turkey is actually good for your body,
but please just eat the turkey breast meat only,
I love breast meat! it's my favourite part of the chicken currently,
healthiest part of a chicky :D

Shopping with the big brothers on Boxing Day!
they are my walking atm hahahhaa kidding ^^

School is reopening in.. 2 weeks, what a horror story )':
bidding next week! gosh another round of A levels..
uni is like.. rounds and rounds of A levels hahahaha,
just that you're not as prepared as you were in junior college ):

Replies
jonj: helloooooo! how's bmt for you so far! hahahha dnt be so kepo teehee ^^
Smelly: hello Monster! BIDDING NEXT WEEK BID WITH ME AH. Let's hang out again some time soon! hahahaha time with you is (: (: (: yay!
Nicole: hahahha yeah because you're retarded! did you bring me food from Taiwan!
Bakwa: they have some fish thing and chicken breast thing now which is not bad also siol! but too bad you got no time to go eat, sigh tsk tsk hahahahaa
Smelly: I WANT PRETTY CUPCAKE LINERS HAHAHAHAHHAA.

2011-12-22T00:36:00.005+08:00

been having quality time with friends and family ^^ (Y)

somehow I got closer to my family as I got older, I think it's just a phase,
a good phase I think! because my brothers are going to get married (maybe soon),
and sooner or later they are gonna have their own family and all..
kind of scary just thinking about it because we're so close!

horrid my future is undecided yet )':
I really dislike this 'leaving me hanging' kind of thing ): bad!
I want to know it now! at least I can get things done and get myself prepared )':
argh argh argh argh argh I WANT TO DIE.
how can this happen to me again, and again?

I'm not young anymore.. and I really dislike it.
major hate for that. (typing this while my BB is charging, I can't believe I can't go out because my BB is not charged. talking about phone slave, or being the slave of your phone, loser.)

First row, 4th boy from the right, I used to like him omg :O

so when I was young I was a bully, like a real bully.
I used to bite kids who are like older than me, I almost crushed this boy's little pinky.
and I bit my childhood friend's cheek all because it was so chubby.
I was a monster, I really was, I wonder how a little girl can be that scary.
during pre-school I liked this boy who's one year younger than me ^^
*sharing a MARS BARS together, that is puppy love hahhahaha (':

okay this is really weird Idk why I'm typing that but, just feels good
recording my life down before I forget all about it.
maybe one day I will forget who I'm & these are the things I want to remember!
***K, everytime I look at the note you wrote on the book you gave me,
I smile (': yes you mind the free publicity hehehe I really do miss your stupid face.

I miss you, the old you, but you're not coming back anymore.

made Mini Brownie Muffins today! really cute bite-size hehe ^^
but sadly it doesnt taste as good as it looks!
the second one is sugar sucre, which is super good in my opinion,
major love for semolina flour! makes everthing tastes better!

SUPER FULL NOW. AND SUPER HUNGRY LAST NIGHT.
sorry for torturing you my poor stomach )':
I've been eating way too must than I should, horrible.
need to be healthy need to be fit need to run moooooore.

I'll try to blog more! if I've things to blog about..
I've come to the phase that things I want to say get too heartfelt
& I'm not sure if I want anyone to read it alr, or if anyone wants to read it hahaha.
I knw it's really annoying to say that I think this is another part of growing up,
but I really think it is, hahaha privacy issues.
alright my thoughts are messed up, but you get me (:

2011-12-08T20:39:00.005+08:00

mummy is this convincing enough for you to get me better baking equipments?
time to invest on my baking! heehehee
*quote: after I get everything for you, you will lose your interest )':
so much for having no determination! but this time I think I'm pretty serious,
it's a lifelong interest! hahahaha which brings me to my Christmas wishlist ^^

(1)

Simply Calphalon Nonstick 6-Piece Bakeware Set

(2)

Norpro 6-Count Nonstick Donut Pan

3)

Lomography LOMO LC-Wide Instant Back Bundle

4)

Salter #800 9 Pound Mechanical Aquatronic Kitchen Scale for Dry or Liquid Measuring

5)

KitchenAid Artisan 5-Quart Stand Mixers

6)

Pretty cupcake liners!

it's funny how I dnt knw whether your presence matters.
or maybe, just maybe, it does but I refuse to think that it does (':
HAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA SIAO.

I really really miss you, all the crazy shitz we do together.
&&& I'm glad you feel the same too (':
you knw the best thing is knowing that you're not the only one feeling that way ^^
I just received the most heartwarming email ever!

I like this photo, we've the brightest eyes ^^

I think I just became.. more heckcare than I was.
perhaps is just because I dnt wanna put in effort without knwing if there's return.
oh god this is bad, bad, bad? )': I just become a selfish beeetch.
I guess in life people do get tired for being the one putting in effort..?
well I'm not saying I'm some noble woman. I'm just tired :/
I'm having some.. weird symptoms )': hello, time to be normal hello.

我可能不會愛你 ♥

2011-12-06T00:23:00.002+08:00

your change scares me, really. or maybe I'm the one who changed,
seems like there's nothing much in common between the 2 of us anymore.
uhmmmm why did things become like this? :O *sigh*
ohwell, good things fall apart so that better things can fall together, yes?

I really really like this guy ^^ heehee thick eyebrows make him super cutesy!

2011-12-04T19:56:00.001+08:00

2011-12-04T16:35:00.002+08:00

heehee I'm as free as a beetle! or cockroach, or.. worms.
anyway today marks the end of finals, teeheehee ^^
seriously I think it's as bad as A levels, or maybe worse than that.
firstly because maybe my concentration level is simply going down, down, down.

I've been sucha lazy bum, but now I'm going to cough out a post,
lazy Sunday morning (: watching teevee with my fatty now!
having an argument on how a manager will definitely have a former player career,
the fact is.. I'm wrong )': because of stupid Boas!

but my spending ability is going up, up, up.
which is really horrible because I'm (going to be) broke soon.
being an impulsive buyer is the most terrible thing ever )':
on Friday, while waiting for K, I walked around & spent on useless stuff.
quote A: I need to lock you up in a cage with no internet connection.

life's simple pleasure:
-watching Doraemon on Channel 8 hohoho ^^
-found out that your brother puts a poladroid of you and him in his wallet,
instead of a poladroid of his girlfriend and him (':
-friends: quickly go bake! pleaseeeeeee, I want to eat!
-newspaper delivery uncle: meimei, thank you for giving me exact (:
-found the old box of Mastermind @ home :D
-reading a big box of old letters you found @ home (':
-watching Arsenal highlights with Chuinyan
-watching RVP and Walcott! they are sooooooooooo sweet ♥

I love the gunners ♥ ♥ ♥

aunt's birthday next week! hehehehe
I'm going to bake her red velvet cupcakes (:
can't wait! my first time making red velvet, with creamcheese frosting!
I baked my oh-so-yummy choc chip with walnut cookies again,
Chuinyan loves them so much! put them in a jar for K's birthday ^^

pretty! although the jar is sooooooo heavy ):

holiday is so awesome ^^ only if it can stop raining everyday!

2011-11-28T00:53:00.002+08:00

I'm severely deprived of nice fooooood )':
even though I knw I can't eat so much anymore, *fattypomz alert*!

BUTBUTBUTBUT, I WANT NICE FOOOOODIE.

2011-11-19T15:47:00.003+08:00

This picture is stunning, xx.
well I'm just learning from Dr Liaoping..
looking @ nice scenery pictures: good for studying ^^
I think that's the only thing I learnt from him after 4 months :D

2011-11-18T19:50:00.002+08:00

I'm so totally not in the mood to study today )':
spent my afternoon daydreaming! about *secret* HAHAHA
then my friends began to whatsapp me like some bombs,
so here I'm! after this I'm gonna study until 1230 waiting for C to fetch me!
then supper teeheehee totally trying to ruin my ~do not gain weight~ plan )':
notice I dnt even dare to say diet, I just hope I dnt get any bigger!

I want to bake, I really really wanna bake!
it's quite a good + healthy activity when you're alone ^^
by healthy I meant, if you dnt end up eating all the baked goods yourself.
which I dnt because I feel gross just looking @ them,
can't imagine eating them :O the last time I baked cookies I gave Y 1/3 of the batch!
I wonder, how a health-conscious + fit person actually, eat them all up :O

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA.

spent another hour looking through my pictures in the computer!
mega guilty but I'm happy ha ha ha I'm unproductive like that le sigh )':

OK. STUDY. NOW.
can't wait to get my gunners jersey! hehehe ^^

2011-11-17T20:02:00.004+08:00

taking a break from studying! ^^ Frankly (Flankry, Smelly!) speaking, I can't take breaks,
I'm not even studying really hard in the first place.. so so soooo distracted.
can't really concentrate, my level of focusing hits the bottom of the meter, seriously.
but ohwell, 1 week more to finals, think I can do something about that ^^
can't wait for it to end alr though, so much fun waiting for me after this! teehee.

anyway Archie's been all over my mind again these days (: (:
to those who dnt knw, shame on you :p I'm referring to David Archuleta..
the only celeb who can get me fangirling~ I meant, I've never liked anyone as much!
well, if you get what I mean ^^ teeheehe.
but the concert this Sat is postponed )': break my heart!

anyway celebrated fatty's birthday yesterday! hehehe happy 28th (:
it's funny how we used to call Chuinyan fatty but now Chuinhong's the fatty :D
I love my gorgors a lot ^^

Craving for American breakfast )': okay maybe not..
feels like the egg benz I had last week is still in my mouth.
HAHAHA healthier life please! I need to eat.. healthy foodiez.
11/11/11 (: I spent it with my gorgor and cuzzzz! lovelove.

alright study study study!
can't wait for xmas, come santa come!

2011-11-05T00:32:00.005+08:00

Replies
jonj: when you going bmt?! hahahahah Mr Pig is someone you knw, true or false?
Bakwa: after exams I'm going to update my music! no time now, time for some serious stuff ^^
Gigolo: wait long long. you're not sexy enough.
Limmin: hiiii omg this tag is so long ago~~~ hope you're enjoying yourself, without chongzi :D
Nicole: I shall go stay more often! but I wanna sleep on the bed if not will backache )':
Smelly: hahahha of cos nice ^^ who baked them? hahahaha (: BAKERY!!! investor anyone?
Frankie stanford: well, somehow they are just in my brain. cos I wrote the lyrics, just kidding.
Den: hello dear! are you in London or something I saw your status on fb (: hahaha how's life haven't talked to you for the longest time! yeah currently in nus, when will you be back!
Nicole: you're the ultimate fat pig. I want more zjm. ypmf also! omg I want highschool canteen.
Sandy: why you come here. talk to Nicole only. never even say hi to me? pfffft/

When I die, and I die loving you.

2011-11-04T15:08:00.004+08:00

Sometimes, I'm just wondering if I'm just looking for the easy way out.
There are many many many ways, but all of them spell uncertainty.
I guess that makes things really difficult )':
#Knowing the presence of uncertainty, but trying to convince yourself that you will overcome it
somehow. some what. someday. sometimes.
that's what scares me; when? how? will it ever happen?
They say: you will achieve it somehow, you will, as long as you're determined.
but you knw, there are sooooo many people out there living their life with regrets.
life doesn't give you honey all the time, you have to fight for it.

so I tell myself, keep going, fighters, it's tough, yes it's tough,
but all that blood & sweat will taste the sweetest if you achieve it (':

If you give me a chance, I will go all the way, never back down, I swear.

it's so easy to dream, but so hard to turn your dream into reality.

pardon for my word vomit (': dnt try to correct my grammar or what not I WILL KILL YOU.
the past week had been.. weird. Idk how to describe it but it's like
I'm forced to grow up all of a sudden/ I thought I was quite a grown up,
but apparently not (': there are so many things waiting to challenge me out there.
I felt really suffocated on Monday (: heart shattered, tears shed..
all is good now I guess? it really felt like end of the world but hey, keep calm & think about it,
nothing can be really that bad (': you just need to figure your way out/

so woah, finals in 3 weeks! and it lasts for about a week (:
end on the 30th! can't wait alr so many things to do after that.
and sooooo many people will be back! alright not that many,
but quite a handful that I'm close to, you guys are dearly missed ^^
I hope I'll have decisions to make by then, I really hope so :D
what feels better that having a chance? nothing hehehe xx.

LET'S HANG IN THERE ILY. ♥ ♥ ♥

when you hit the bottom, you knw everything's just going to get better (':

2011-10-31T19:21:00.002+08:00

so, so, so painful.

I really dnt knw how. I'm lost.

I think I need some strength. I need someone to pick me up.
I hate dealing with this but afterall, I'm the one who got myself into this.
stay strong, be stronger (':

A wall as high as Mount Everest for you to climb.

feel like giving up? what did you say about YOUR determination?
just think back; recall what you used to tell people confidently.
did you change? or because the situation changed you?
or maybe you weren't determined in the first place? ask yourself.

where is that passionate little girl?
where is she hiding? I need to find her back.

Never, say never.

♥ ♥ ♥

//just, follow your heart xx.

2011-10-26T19:01:00.000+08:00

Chuinyan: hey do you have my baby photos in your laptop?
Me: huh??? your baby photos? in my laptop?
Chuinyan: help me scan my baby photos please, so cute :D

my brother is 23 by the way, (Y) HAHAHA GROSS PIG.

anyway yay for Deepavali break! even though it's just one day, good enough!
heehee been watching some movies recently, good ol' movies (:

Seven- really good! a really smart movie like Angels & Demons, me likey ^^
A Little Thing Called Love- I first started watching because of the cute guy but shed a bucket of tears for it )': true love never dies hahahaha! why didn't I spot any cute guys in Bkk??!
For Love of the Game- it's not really exciting but I really like this show! it's about this pitcher ending his 19-years career with a perfect game (: Hengyang should watch it!!!! Schizo too (:

ayeayeaye I'm a pirate hoolalala hohoho :D

okay after my exams I will watch all shows by Anne Hathaway :D
she's seriously, too pretty! I love her :D not the conventional kind of pretty but
she's really really cool ^^ oh right and watch one tree hill! (Y)
so many things I wanna do during the Dec break!
I've a baking list & eating list teehee ^^ my brother is gonna invest on a proer + bigger oven in me
because I've successfully convinced him that I'm very capable in baking HAHAH :D

Last week I watched Oneday + ate Ramen @ Ken's with Shabshab,
then I went to NTU to stay over with Warriors,
and Saturday I had dinner with Hcanoe 09/10 girls + Markus + Fiona + Kaiwen (':
fulfiling week I would say! would've died for school if Smelly isn't around,
well it will get better, I know it will get better hehehe ^^
we're self-entertaining + laugh @ people + Subway duo~~~~

OKAY STUDY, CATCH UP WITH STUDIES (: LAI CHUINYIN.

2011-10-23T22:37:00.003+08:00

another one (: this is still fresh hehehe ^^

they really do taste quite like famous amos!
alright mugging for org chem test tmr, go chuinyin (:

2011-10-23T22:35:00.001+08:00

HEHEHEH SHOW YOU MY PRODUCTS :D

YES THEY LOOK TOOOOOOO GOOD AND PRETTY!

2011-10-19T01:06:00.001+08:00

How cute are they??? omg I loooooove Beck's boys (:
look at Romeo! and Cruz hahhahahah I love love love them (:

2011-10-16T18:22:00.001+08:00

SHIT WHY IS HE SO CUTE I'M FALLING. NOT.
JUST KIDDING HAHAHAHAHA.

2011-10-15T22:09:00.002+08:00

^^ that was my dinner! hahhaha guess I feel v happy cooking/baking these days,
really vvv good ways to destress! now.. back to doing lab report )':
have to figure out how to get it done by Monday, seriously.

it isn't all that tough, but you knw, I just dnt knw how to continues, and piece them up
into one single report )': hate doing things without format, sigh.

anyway these few days had been fun! (I knw my grammar sucks stop laughing at my English alr, YOU)
esp today! had a good laugh @ loverboi and all, teeheehee ^^
and after school I went to have really yummy fish porridge with Smelly @ Clementi!
and it was the very last lab lesson! (: no wait, one more anat lab to goooooo (:
I think I will really miss Mr Singh! he's so. freaking. cute :D hahahaha!

my ears are really itchy I think there are worms inside.
anyway I was talking about the life triangle with Schizo! and I realized something,
no matter how hard I try I can never achieve all three!
I think J1 it was social life + health then I had super, duper shitty grades.
J2 it was social life + good grades! then my health kinda suffered )':
now it's good health + good grades & not much of social life!
Idk which one I like more but.. I guess all ain't too bad! okay the conclusion is no conclusion.

Last night my dear friends Piggo + Bestie + Binbin + Shabushi went mad.
too high on sugar because of my cupcakes (: happy that they turned out well!
I haven't tried a successful one myself but wheeeeee that they are so, so good ^^

OKAY HELLO LAB REPORT I'M HERE TO CONQUER YOUZ/

2011-10-14T20:52:00.000+08:00

GRILLED FISH SANDWICH WITH YOGURT ^^ YUMMMMY NOMNOMNOM.

2011-10-13T01:59:00.002+08:00

CHOCOLATE BANANA LAVA CUPCAKE ^^
can't really taste the banana though! but I swear I'm getting better teeheehee :D

2011-10-12T00:43:00.003+08:00

studying last paper for the weeeeeek! just feel like typing something out ^^
the tests are never ending! so tired alr.. finishing up lab report(s) then
have to study (again) for another test that is a week later..
seems like I can't really rest until everything's all over? well.

I'm going to start my vvv healthy lifestyle as a Bohemian HAHA :D

10-things-that-I-must-eat-or-drink!

1) Chicken breast meat ^^ or chicken, any part of chicken except the butt, I like!
2) Salmon! (schizo we're supposed to go for buffet and finish the restaurant's salmon??)
3) Strawberries!!! (high in Vitamin C, anti-wrinkles because you'll have more collagen ^^)
4) Tomatoessssss (contains lycopene + lutein = protects & hydrate your skin!!!)
5) WATER. so, so, so essential and so, so, so good for your body (:
7) low fat yogurt! for your calcium intake teeheehee :D
8) dark chocolate! (contains flavonoids to fight skin-damaging free radicals!
9) Greentea (antioxidant that reduces environmental skin damages)
10) Vege, vege and more vege ^^

OKAY I'M JUST CRAZY, but I'll try anywayyyyyy (:

2011-10-10T21:41:00.004+08:00

some overexposed photo that turned out quite nice anyway (:

been trying to study since 6pm but I dnt seem to be concentrating? nothing much is going in.
it's weird, everyday just pass without much sense of accomplishment )':
kinda miss jc, missing the morning-noon lesson, then doing whatever I like/have to do,
be it studying, or go out to catch a movie, or just sitting around at classbench.
well I guess life as a grown-up is pretty pointless, activities are usually at night..
and I really dislike sleeping late/going home late/not having my night for myself.
sleeping late is a major No-no it's so freaking bad for health )':

tada! this is to freak you out, forgot when I took this but I've a lot of webcam photos in my comp??
ohgod why am I becoming like Sandy. anyway I probably thought I looked good -.-
or was I having a goodhair-day or something? nice moustache anyway, hahaha ^^

currently I've to study (2 tests coming up!) + do my lab report ):
as well as some part of 1101 and 1401 for me to catch up on.. been slacking too much sigh.
time waits for no woman. okay what am I talking about? this is weird.

guess I'm really getting older, I can feel the world sucking away my energy.
ohwell maybe I just need sem-break to come, need it, I really need it.
around 1.5 months to go! I'm sure we can get through this ^^

oh by the way whoever is reading this, my simcard has some problem )':
so basically I can't text/call/receive text/answer calls!
but I still can bbm/whatsapp/facebook so yeah! only when there's wireless..
but it isn't that bad alr at least I'm still somewhat contactable! when I'm in school/at home.

would you?

2011-10-04T22:47:00.003+08:00

To do list- my memory is seriously failing on me.
1) Opsmile scape floor plan by Sunday
2) File my notes (get a hole-puncher)
3) Study for LSM1101 & LSM1102 CA ):
4) Fix my freaking dumb stupid printer.
5) I think there should be a longer list but I seriously can't remember ):

I HATE MY BRAIN. (ANGSTY)

2011-09-30T20:20:00.004+08:00

End of midterms;;; IKEA Alexandra our fav place w our fav food, Salmon with Broccoli!

life just gets better because it can never get worse (x)

this is a wrong better, life gets better because you have awesome people with you (':
some may not be physically around but I thank Whatsapp + Skype + Email,
it feels like they are just in Singapore (': just that they are too busy to meet me ^^
have to wake up at 7am dnt be a pig, dnt be a pig. :D

Next week: bakebakebake, Oakham, dinner with M, dinner with 76 ^^ Happy E-learning!
super excited for baking!!!!! hahaha if you want your share TEXT ME & ask for it wahaha :D
Scones tmr (maybe) and cupcakes on Wednesday!!!! hehehe ^^ so excited.

why do I always bend down when taking photos when I'm already vertically challenged??!

Finally ended the painful 'Saying Goodbyes' phase..
hopefully I dnt have to say them again anytime soon ^^ hopefully not next year, hopefully.
I think I had the most most ultra terrible Goodbye with Wee/Foo but now all is good!
seeing that they are enjoying themselves and they still think of me at times,
ALL IS WELL ^^ and omg Weiqing's pretty room!!!!!! so proud of that girl (':
& seeing my pretty gift on Jodie's room, SO PROUD OF MYSELF HAHA (''''''':

to all of you, all of you, all of you (':

sometimes, I feel that I'm standing alone, all alone, in the place.
somehow I feel that I dnt really belong here..? like maybe I should live in Pluto?
maybe Venus. alright, that's not the point.
I feel like, I'm surrounded by people but somehow, I feel that I'm all alone.
not lonely, but alone. Or rather, I feel good being alone. somehow.
I'm scared, I'm scared when people get too close, too close.

hahhaha need to shut those weird thoughts out of my mind.
Sometimes I wonder if I'm really anti-social.. maybe I really am.

ASIAN POWAAAAAAAAH ^^ HAHAHA PEACE SIGN. Oh, why are we so gay?

For a moment, I thought. eh actually I just need my parents, my brothers & maybe 3 friends.
then I realized it's quite impossible.. hahaha because my parents will pass away before me,
my brothers will get married and have their own kids & so..
I still need to have my own family. Having a family is such a scary thing..
imagine 7 years later I'll have my own kids, if I've finished studying by then.
Managing a family is so, so, hard. but if you can do it you're really one incredible person (Y)

EH MY COHABEETAT FRIEND PLEASE DNT LEAVE ME STANDING ALONE OUTSIDE YOUR BUNGALOW.

2011-09-24T22:30:00.005+08:00

(liking this photo because.. I dnt knw! I just like it ^^)

haven't felt so stressful for quite a while )': )':
but it's okay because since I'm in this situation alr I'm just going to make the best out of it!
study study study study study study study (Y)
studying makes me smarter hence I like studying, oh right,
like is an understatement, I LOVE studying.. oh right oh right oh right.
Anatomy you're killlllling me.. somehow I think I'm stressing myself out too much?
oh come on, if you can't do it who else can do it? ---> overconfident, symptoms of going crazy.

they said A levels was the end, HELL NO, they are all liars, liars liars pants on fire.
so the past 1 week. I spent my time mugging + going to airport several times )':
what a recess week. I can't wait for my elearning week! must enjoy myself nomnomnom.

BYEBYE ENEMY )': Take careeeeeee!

it started with the airport slide, you knw as long as you spent 10$ on a single receipt,
you get a free slide ticket? sooooo we just saw some receipts on the floor and pick them up (6 of us).
then it turned into a receipt-hunting trip.. CHEAPOS TTM.
during the adventure, we saw this little sitting on the floor, crying out loud.
being the oh so caring wonderful cute jiejie, I squad down and tried to console her,
thinking that she's lost: Then I realized that her mom dumped her there cos she's naughty??
#HEARTLESSMOM101 I will never do that to my kids!

soooooo, I still think you guys are having the most similar frequency as me!
although my frequency is getting a bit alien-ish (: still, same frequency!
so hard to meet people with the same frequency these days )':
well people who aren't weird, fun, crazy, then again love their family and home (:
I dnt knw? I think some people are just too friends-orientated?
well I knw it is essential but.. don't you need some time for yourself?
I picture myself in their shoes.. & I feel very very empty deep inside.
alright I'm in no position to say this! I just hope you dnt get too lost in life ^^

happy because I met Schizo just now (': it's been a while ah.
life just keeps getting our head spinning I'm lost in this town/

I need to be a little more motivated? and care more about things?
I think I'm a little too.. whatever. can't find a word to describe it.
I can imagine myself being a rich single lady (must be quite rich),
lying in my bed all day eating cherries and cantaloupes (:

Glad you guys are with me ^^

2011-09-18T14:48:00.003+08:00

Kinda losing my drive )': oh why oh whyyyyy.
maybe I just dnt remember the reason I'm doing this anymore.
well when things get tough you just get confused.. sort of like feeling lost?
like you dnt find the reason in doing anything anymore. ):
Ohwell, it will get better I think, it can only get better (':

I had this card-making spree! I had so many to make my creativity jooze's running out ):
ended up sleeping @ 4am on Friday )': well you knw I sleep as early as 10pm.
well I guess the purpose of handmaking card is to make the receiver feel loved??
sooooo even if they ain't nice, it's fine hahahha :D
besides, I personally think that my cards are pretty awesome hoho ^^ Artsy Fartsy!

Midterms, I really really hate you nothing seems to be going into my brain.

I had a spontaneous dindindate with my Ele-school friends (': good times ^^
I didn't knw I was such a horrible bully back then, not much better now
but I was too horrible??? you knw the hate-friend list in the autograph books,
7/10 of the guys list me in the hate-friend column )': WHAT DID I DO???

anyway can't wait for my supreeeee stuff to arrive, yaaaaaay :D

the older I get, the more heckcare I become.
sometimes, I think I'm such a bummmmm and I'm so damn useless.
OKAY START OF RECESS WEEK, STUDY HARD LOVELIES ^^

bye love, take vvv good care of yourself (:

2011-09-12T20:34:00.004+08:00

Replies!
well because I hardly reply people dnt tag anymooooore, poooooooof )':

Smelly: Hello insect! Mr Takao Inoue tmr hahaaha excites! :D one more week we can do this together! 3 days to be exact wahaha ^^ yes we can!!!!!! teeheehee (: I looooooove you!
Bakwa: you better do well for your prelims if not you won't get to see me forever!!!
Den: denden! did you receive my FB message? I'm in NUS currently! not architecture though.
Guess who: HELLO MOTHER!!!!! I LUBBBBS YOU :D WO DE MAMA (Y)
jonj: when are you going to bmt again?? go get new hair ^^ I'm not a crybaby!
Nicole: HAIIIIIII (: I wanna go stay in your roooooooooom! say hi to yy please!
Sandy: Shabushi san you've a lot of things with me yknow.. claim them soon pleasez.
Bakwa: ego bigger than the sky (√) CHECK. hahahhaa (:

I'm sooooo glad that I'm your #1, nothing ever felt so good (:

2011-09-12T19:32:00.008+08:00

Shall update before I conquer my 1401 :D
hahahaha school's getting better I think.. (: slacker and well, you just get used to it.
only problem is.. dnt knw what to eat for lunch! that's the biggest problem. ^^
lesson's alright but I think I'm losing abit or ~drive~ :O
ah well, recess week is coming anyway right time good time I can recharge!

soooooooo, it was mid autumn festival (:
not just any other mid autumn festival but MAF in Hwachong.
I think it's hard for people from other schools to understand why Hwachongians love Hwach,
and why we're sooooo all excited to attend maf!
A: 'uh you mean you guys just crowd around and sing/dance & sweat like mad? FUN??'
well crazy enough, but I think it is a Hwachong spirit, kinda like..
Liverpool's #You will never walk alone.
The Hwachong version is.. #You will never eat mooncake alone.

it's good to see everyone again! (: oh and I had Hcanoe Pvsp @ Macritchie in the afternoon!
felt soooooo good! at first I was a little skeptical about it but it was all awesome ^^
we've like seniors from 03-08 batch and the current batch of juniors and the Hwach boys (:
well if you wanna count Mr Quek in we've seniors from the 2000 batch or something wahaha.

it's really nice to be back in the Monkeyland again & paddle,
it's good enough to just seeing everyone, would be better if Haoxia/Markus/Fiona goes back (':
and having a full team (Quekky/Simin/Yix couldn't go *sobs*)
we did K4! stability much better than I expected since we've never done it in that combi before..
but still, we capsized when we're like 2 buoys away from the finishing line )':
sigh, I still can't keep myself calm enough being a frontman I guessssss.

then it was back to school! (': to see Mrheng* and Chenlaoshi*
didn't get to see the rest of the teachers though, too chaotic in school.
but it was awesome seeing everyone around!
a little bit sad because Ahwee isn't around this time.. our class photographer.
hey you da ren! just know that we haven't forgotten about you at all alright ^^

I LOVE HWACH I'M PROUD TO BE A HWACHIE :D

Love is about, seeing the imperfections in each other and think that they are perfect.

2011-09-08T00:16:00.003+08:00

I want some snail mails (':

Anyway this week is horrible ^^ horrible but still.. smiley faces. ^^
because.. well Pingpong left yesterday )': heartache. HEARTACHE.
but well, someone told me & I thought about it a little.
#Some people left you, but what about the people who are still here? are they not important?!#
well, I really really treasure the people who are still here with me (':
and for those who left, even though you are not physically here,
you're always a whatsapp/bbm/facebook/email/snailmail away (':
so much for the overwhelming technology.. but now I really appreciate the existance of it.

MAF ON SATURDAY ^^ !!!!
can't wait!!!! Back to Hwachong again, I really miss Hwachong.
somehow uni just doesn't have the.. Home-y feeling that Hwach/Hcanoe gives me.
I feel that I dnt really belong there..? HAHA I'm a new ambition btw, damn loser!
but hehe school is so much bearable with Smelly around (':
Hello Smelly, public declaration of love, HELLOOOOO :D
(I bet you're on AYE now hahahahahahaha)

loooooong weekend ahead, teeheehee (:

2011-09-04T21:31:00.002+08:00

If love is a chase, would you be my hunter?

2011-08-30T20:03:00.005+08:00

We need to buy some players )': )': The 8-2 was terribly painful..
sometimes it's just awful that your team isn't performing ):
Arsene, save us will ya?

SICK AGAIN. Sometimes the stupid fever just comes so quick.. merciless ):
need to be strong!!! I've been living my healthy life-style Idk what's wrong.
I'm guessing sleeping late- watching drama is the main culprit.
Time to have some get-strong pills!

Time	Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
8am				NUR 1117 (L) NUR_LT 29
9am	CM 1401 (T) S9A-0102			NUR 1117 (L) NUR_LT 29
10am	CM 1401 (L) LT 27			CM 1401 (L) LT 27	LSM 1101 (Lab) LSLAB8 ODD
11am	CM 1401 (L) LT 27		NUR 1117 (L) NUR_LT 29	CM 1401 (L) LT 27
12pm		LSM 1101 (L) LT 25
1pm		LSM 1101 (L) LT 25
2pm	LSM 1102 (Lab) LSLAB1/2/4/9 EVEN			NUR 1117 (Lab) EVEN NUR_DM1/4/9/10
3pm				NUR 1117 (Lab) EVEN NUR_DM1/4/9/10
4pm			LSM 1102 (L) LT 25
5pm			LSM 1102 (L) LT 25
6pm		LSM 1101 (T) LT 25	LSM 1102 (T) LT 25

Dropped a mod so things are looking better! next term will be crazy though (:
no matter what we will be able to survive anyway!

Today I spent my day at B's house, home cooked lunch! (:
studied Anat & Physio, it was a good attempt anyway.
let me recap some terms without looking at the textbook:
Frontal, coronal, ventral, dorsal, antecubital, antebrachial (forearm), brachial (arm), buccal (cheek?), acromial (point of shoulder), antecubital, axillary (armpit), carpal (wrist), cervical (neck), digital (fingers/toes), coxal (hip)..
Seeeeeeeee, quite a good attempt right ^^

I'M MISSING OUT ON COUSINS OUTING ): ): ): ):

anyway so my Da Ren left on Saturday morning )':
trust me I really didn't want to cry.. but the thought of her not being around anymore is plain awful.
because she's always there and I feel that I didn't treasure it as much.
well, you will never treasure something until you lose it, that's the old saying right.
but it's so soooooo true anyway.

So I think about the possibilities- it is not possible. ♥ ♥ ♥

& & & Maybe I'm living in the past, but you're moving way too fast,
I leave you because I cannot catch up with you.
when you feel lonely and turn back, I won't be there anymore.

2011-08-24T21:28:00.004+08:00

This brick wall- we will break it, together.

Dislike how everything is turning into trends~
'because everyone has it, I must also have it.'
sickening whooops. well because everything become so easily accessible and affordable..
one can never be special anymore ): All Hail Unique People.
People who dare to be different (: are you one of them?

Lab report. Still doing lab report, kill me please I'm so tired )':
(-.-) ---> this is the state of my face right now. cannot sleep, cannot.
I knw what I'm doing, I knw studies come first and I won't give it up for anything (:
Priority is priority! okay I will not complain about how tired I'm because I choose this myself!
you make your own choices, you design how you want your life to be,
nobody force you to do things, to take part in things, so.. don't complain (:

Anyway I feel good! last night was seriously fun ^^ didn't knw bel can be so retarded!
everything is so talkative/retarded/fun I feel like I'm back to.. J1 all over again (:
I think people-wise I definitely prefer B,
but in terms of what I like to do, I think I still like A better )': Dilemma ): ): ):

NEW CANDY HAHAHAAHAHAHAHA.

Learning to cope with life, learning to cope with a missing heart (':
I'm trying my best, really (: (: I can do this! I tend to psycho myself a lot these days..

2011-08-22T21:06:00.004+08:00

writing lab report now.. Major hate )': the criteria? not more than 10 pages..
seriously man it's not like I'm a scientist or what.. bada bada labs can kill )':
hehe but thank god for Atiq!!! :D when asked her about Jeremy..
'is it the buff like a bull guy???' HAHA Jem you need to reflect.

anyway tmr I shall attempt to cook, ABC Soup!!! (: I loooove it and it's relatively easy to make!
Mum: how come everything you cook is like baby food (porridge/pumpkin/sweetpotato etc.)
I totally think I'm taking in enough nutrition ^^ Awesome chef #1 :D

SOOOO TIRED. been waking up at like.. 520/530/6/630 )': yes! no later than 630.
feeling kinda.. half hearted though? but I guess the priorities come first?
Keep calm and carry on, Go me! fight fight fight fight on (:

Do you hold your tears, or do you let them pour?

Recently, whenever I talk, people around me always think that I'm talking to them..
then they will proceed to looking @ me weirdly/respond to me :O
Self reminder: need to talk softly, need to talk softly (:

I miss my Hwachie juniors )': kinda miss doing stupid stuff with them!
Hello Hermit Han I haven't seen you for 1.5 months..

(We're healthy healthy healthy girlzz :D wink wink clark * HAHAHA)

Archixxx and Sciencexxx, Heaven and Earth )': (hello smelly your new friend ^^)

There's something I really really miss, I think (':

Wee leaving in 5 days/Pingpong leaving in 2 weeks/
P & Qian in a month/L & Qing in a month and a week, how terrible.

2011-08-16T23:07:00.002+08:00

school's beeeeeen pretty awesome ^^ I think?
I can alr name my favourite lecturer and least favourite!
well there's one more lecture tmr, we shall see!
anw I really like the stuff I'm learning, pretty interesting!
oh right, except for CM1131 Physical Chem,
I think it should be called, Chemical Physics instead.
sooooooo much physics involved? Just. kill. me. already. please.
Dislike, major dislike, stupid equations, and more equations ):

anyway it's really good seeing familiar faces around, as well as people with slight similarities (':
I guess being from Hwachong is somewhat a similarity?
I get the homey feeling whenever I see Hwachie schoolmates teehee ^^
even for those that I dnt used to talk/say hi to, I'm making friends with them now!
like somewhat you will just smile/talk to them.. it's quite a good feeling really! (':

having lots of thoughts recently! will talk about it soon (:
8D MUGGY ME :D not muddy, but muggy! I miss Haoxia the old man )':

2011-08-11T00:12:00.002+08:00

Packed my bag, brushed my teeth, all ready for school! ^^
I'm kinda excited but.. stressed )': it's okay! you're your own enemy (:

today I had a really good time hanging out with CheekyChocolate & Christian!
more about that next time! Lychee+milo+oreo milkshake @ Kichn is totally,
Pee from Heaven (: A cup of yumminess ^^

SLEEPING NOW, CHARGING MY LAPTOP/BB/BODY/HEART :D

2011-08-09T00:51:00.003+08:00

soooooo good to touch H20 again (':

woah I think, there's something I need to do for my dark circles/eyebags.
because I foresee them getting worse, I'm going to be zombiefied.
this is pretty much my current mood right now actually )':
abit worried + irritated + sad + frustrated.. ah well silly silly me.

okay must charge, charge, charge myself. ^^
things are going to be fine, really! *confidence boost*
I'm best @ psychoping myself, seriously.. boom boom boomz :D
well, the best thing is- we're all in this together. (:
it's like, canoeing used to be soooooo tough but we suffered together,
so everything seemed like nothing anymore, it works just the same (':

CARES LIKE A MUM, I LOVE YOU MOMMY.

Reminder: Print photos + make cards/scrapbook (Mega important*)

2011-08-09T00:04:00.000+08:00

Time	Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
8am				NUR 1117 (L) NUR_LT 29
9am			CM 1131 (L) LT 27	NUR 1117 (L) NUR_LT 29
10am	CM 1401 (L) LT 27			CM 1401 (L) LT 27	LSM 1101 (Lab) LSLAB8
11am	CM 1401 (L) LT 27		NUR 1117 (L) NUR_LT 29	CM 1401 (L) LT 27
12pm	CM 1401 (T) S9A-0102	LSM 1101 (L) LT 25
1pm		LSM 1101 (L) LT 25	CM1131 (T) S5-0224
2pm	LSM 1102 (Lab) LSLAB1/2/4/9			NUR 1117 (Lab) EVEN NUR_DM1/4/9/10
3pm				NUR 1117 (Lab) EVEN NUR_DM1/4/9/10
4pm		CM 1131 (L) LT 25	LSM 1102 (L) LT 25		CM 1131 (L) LT 25
5pm		CM 1131 (L) LT 25	LSM 1102 (L) LT 25		CM 1131 (L) LT 25
6pm		LSM 1101 (T) LT 25	LSM 1102 (T) LT 25

A really, really, really, really crazy timetable )':
but it's okay, we can do it!

2011-08-04T23:04:00.003+08:00

HAHAHAHAHA SO KEWT I LOVE PAPA AU AND MAMA AU ♥

these few days I've been settling my own meals (: which is pretty cool because..
now I finally understand hard it is )': now I knw why daddy always asks us dnt complain!
I tried cooking like porridge and sweet potato and pumpkin and stuff (:
hahahha seriously, mega mega healthy! but they are nice so no complains from me :D
still not very nice but.. I'm going to master cooking one day! awesome chinese soup!

so I'm talking to sheep on MSN now and my eyes suddenly felt teary?
she's leaving in like 2 weeks.. probably the first of my friends )':
suddenly I feel that everyone's going to leave me, leave me alone standing.
Pingpong!!/Qianz/P/Larrie/Xiuhui/Weiqing/Sheep/Maria/yadayadaaaaa..
okay actually I'm not so overwhelmed by this negativity but it's just,
saying goodbyes generally dnt feel good )': hate it hate it hate it.
Hello emotional self please hide yourself somewhere kthxbai ^^

anyway vvv excited for lessons to start! yeah okay I'm mad like this but seriously....

Anatomy and Physiology 1 (NUR1117)
Chemistry for Life Sciences (CM1401)
Biochemistry of Biomolecules (LSM1101)
Molecular Genetics (LSM1102)
Physical Chemistry 1 (CM1131)

wahaha, seriously crazy enough but I'm pretty excited 8D
HEEHEE I'M GOING TO BE A GEEK WHO'S WITH ME!
with a goal in mind, I'm pretty sure we're going to be focused and achieve what we want. ♥
I believe God has a plan for everyone (whichever god you believe in) (:
we just have to accept the outcome, do what you can do, do your best,
and you will be rewarded eventually (:

lovely, lovely week so far because of people I love/
∞ travel to eternity, with you (:

2011-07-30T21:56:00.004+08:00

emotions.

my heart is feeling weird, I think there's something wrong with the hormones.
sometimes I think I need more emotions, and reactions.
tired, tired, tired.

2011-07-30T01:56:00.000+08:00

MAYBE.

2011-07-29T22:47:00.009+08:00

it's the time of the year again..
packing my stuff, preparing to move out from home, preparing for school to start.
guess I'm pretty much immune to it, this is the 7th year eh?
as compared to people's first time, I guess mine is not much of a big deal (':

well momsie does her usual speech: dnt always go home too late, must eat regularly, make sure people accompany you home when you go back late, eat more vege and fruits, must come back to visit us (I didn't go back for about 10 months last year, she was pretty freaked out) must be neat, must do your laundry, must call home, drink more water, yada yadaaaaa..
it's just one causeway away, makes me wonder how much she will say when I go us/uk for post grad next time?? haha mom will always be mom, but that's what I always miss when I'm away.

been thinking a lot recently, a tad too much for my own good (:
but anyway, if you dnt think you can't mature, so you must think.

I was thinking about, what I really want to achieve in life,
not just what I want to be, but what kind of person I wanna be.
I look at some people, they say they wanna be doctor, dentist, lawyer (yes I'm generalizing)
but I wonder: will you be a good/kind one to serve the world? or do you just want to be because you're smart/you want a job with good pay/people say it's wasted if you dnt be one?
I think some people are just directionless, and I kinda feel sad for them?
it's like.. their souls detach from their bodies and live for other people.
but you knw, the world is unfair. these people always get rewarded, I dnt get it.
then again, if you get it, it's not life anymore because life never makes sense.

another thing that I'm really glad about my life is.. my family (:
I look at some people and I think: well that's not that I want?
that's my own very extremist opinion so I'll just keep it to myself,
sorta like, 'oh I'm having the best thing in the world people who dnt have it are sad people'
okay I think I just like what I have now, and I really appreciate it (':
I like how everything falls so nicely together, like jigsaw puzzles.
maybe it does not form a perfect picture, but well it's complete and that's good enough,
well only if you get me (:

without them I wouldn't be who I'm now, I wouldn't say I'm awesome/perfect/good
but since I'm quite ego I would say there's something I love about myself (:

then I thought about death, one day we're all going to die so why not?
well I think I want to die before all the people I love..
you knw the saying: the saddest is not the one leaving, but those left behind.
something along that line, when I leave I hope I leave no trace..
you gonna miss me when I'm gone (?) Idk I mean it as a statement or as a question.
I want to leave and not come back to this world again, and not live again.
I definitely dnt want to reincarnate because there isn't a creature I really want to be.
I guess living once is good enough, it's a good experience (:
I really wonder what happens when people die, will I be up there watching everyone?

you knw I honestly, honestly dnt foresee the day that I'm going to give my heart, to anyone.
maybe it's too early to say it but no, I can't imagine.
I was telling someone that well 20 years down the road, I can totally imagine myself,
buying presents for my nephews and nieces because I'm so loaded with $ wahaha ^^
okay not being serious at all teeheehee.

I've that picture inside my head, but I'm not sure if you're part of it.

2011-07-28T11:13:00.002+08:00

yaaaaaaay done with bidding of modules! okay not the whole thing yet, but done for now!
it's pretty fun! (: quote 'yeah why we so chiong suah!'
A pretty packed timetable I guess I will just study really hard!
after all, there's nothing you can't achieve if you try hard enough, aight?

guess I'm missing out a lot, to some people.
but personally I feel that I'm pretty occupied and I've more important things to hold on to,
definitely dnt want to regret why I let go when they are gone (':

last night I had movies with Chuinyan Chuinhong & my dasao!
very awesome family bonding time teeheehee ^^ I love how they are so old, yet so childish.
spending most of this week with my family! gotta miss them again when I'm off (':

if you're gone from my life, maybe it will be less complicated and.. better?
anyway this is a vvvv funny quote!

2011-07-23T11:50:00.004+08:00

because I get energy from people around me;

feeling the weight that time is adding to my body,
it's accumulative, at every phase of my life, it gets heavier and heavier.
yes, you get stronger.. but it gets harder at the same time.
so you will never feel that you're up for it fully, never ever.
it's never ending, never ever. I wish I can go back to times when I was a baby?
how I wish I can take down the burden and throw it into the sea..
Alright no escaping! be strong, stronger, overcome the mountain :D

some photos from bkk! :D

Tuk-tuk, scammer taxi drivers, THAI CENTRE, Sky-dining breakfast @ hotel, French toast, Platinum mall, Choco-banana crepe, Harry Potter, Chatuchak, vvv nice coffee, BTS, ARL, tomyam, padthai, green curry, crabstick creamcheese roll, Baiyoke, MBK, thai massage, Buddhi-belly, Lauch My Line, Patrick Mcdonald, KATHY ROSE, Tracy, Damn-nice cab driver, 40-baht (SGD 1.60) cabfare, Black soya-milk, Foot-long cheese, Cup noodles, sleeping in public, Chuinyin Aw, Sweet tranny, Cute thai guys, cute angmoh boys.. ♥ ♥ ♥

I'm going for mountain climbing with my godparents tmr! at 5am.. :O *gasps*

life is so fast-paced it doesn't allow me to miss anything at all.
okay why do I always sound like, something is controlling me?
this is my life and I should design how I want to live,
anyway, I was looking through some Facebook notes (:
sometimes these memories really make me glad for the existence of the little evil.

####

ATTENTION ALL HWACHONG CANOEING GIRLS!

In this increasingly globalized world where the risk of contracting the ever virulent h1n1 influenza is extremely high, the importance of keeping yourself healthy and hence risk-free is more urgent than ever. As such, the revered, compassionate and doting coach of the Hwa Chong Canoeing girls' team, Mr Francis Goh Hao Hiap has dug deep into his pockets and spent a whopping $77.85 on calcium pills for the consumption of his beloved girls. In addition to keeping one strong and healthy, calcium pills have numerous other benefits too, such as strengthening one's bones and of course, aiding the vertically challenged* in their quest to obtain better, wider views of the world. However, do keep in mind that nothing is free in this world and one must always be grateful to those who render them help. And what other better way to do this than to repay Mr Goh in cold, hard cash? FIVE DOLLARS, that's all your distressed treasurer is asking of you. Low on cash? Here's a suggestion: quit splurging on frivolous items such as the Mr Men and Little Miss keychains. Remember - calcium pills are the key to your well being, which takes precedence above all else in life. Do not underestimate the power of the little calcium pill.

YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO - PAY UP! (:

* Sadly to say, the large majority of the Hwa Chong Canoeing girls' team has yet to reach the average height of girls, which is 1.6m.

####

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA SO CUTE.

2011-07-14T00:20:00.003+08:00

True friends- I come to you for help, you come to me for help...
Fake friends- you come to me for help, I can't find you when I need help.
(I hope you can see this, and you know that I'm actually talking about you.)

Rubeus Hagrid;
Your favorite animal.

DOLPHIN!!!!!!!!!!!!

PS. will be gone for the next 6 days! ^^
Padthai + Mango sticky rice = FATTY POMZ CHUINYIN!!!

2011-07-13T20:50:00.003+08:00

you're my candle ♥♥♥

2011-07-11T01:22:00.001+08:00

There is a smile on my face when the LED light turns blue (:

2011-07-11T00:23:00.006+08:00

then you come crashing in, like the realest thing/

about pangseh-ing: okay my friends who knw me & kena pangseh by me before )':
public apology;;; I knw I'm really really horrible! but sometimes when nearing to our dates,
I figure out that I've alot of things undone/I'm tired/I haven't spent enough time w my family,
then I usually, choose giving myself some time over going out with friends ):
it's really horrible.. and I've done it many many times sigh. Major dislike.

Severus Snape;
Your favorite Alcoholic beverage.

I dnt really have one?! I drink everything because my papa said 'you must drink everything so that next time no one can make you drunk (Y)' I think it's a good philosophy. I guess that's the reason that my brother hardly gets hangovers, like thank goodness he doesn't (: ohwell, I think my favouriteeeee is Chocolate Wine ^^ but they dnt sell it here huh? )': ahwell I dnt really fancy drinking alcohol! I won't have the urge to drink it.. well unless people pay for me (:

hehehe did the itinerary for the trip! currently I'm focusing on getting my life organized,
& it's going on pretty well (': also sorted out photos to print! hehe ^^
going to print them out tmr! 123 photos hehehe I love printing photos..
I really like looking at nice photos! I can be happy/excited the whole day cos of that :O
you knw I dnt think anyone uses :O this face except.. Sweekiat who uses it damn often

I kinda miss school quite abit! I miss wearing the Hwachie uniform ):
I really miss the reading room! I miss studying/teaching people and feeling smart ^^
okay well, I miss the feeling smart part the most.
frankly speaking, Idk which part of Hwachong life I miss the most.
but it's either the train-like-hell-results-like-shit period or the mug-like-madman period (':

me: why you keep buying food for me to eat, I thought you said I'm fat?
Gor: fat then fat alr what, just expand abit more also nvm..

Gor: eh do you have a boyfriend? like nan peng you?
me: erm I've boy-friends dnt have boyfriend lah! whyyyyy?
Gor: *shakeshead* so expected, mei ren yao.

me: omg so much hair on the floor? all my hair?!?! shit I think maybe I have cancer..
Gor: (-.-) can you dnt be so stupid? how can you relate falling a lot of hair to cancer? you knw why cancer patients have no hair? cos they undergo chemotherapy, then the hair falls! stupid! are you a bio student.....?!!!

Please be nicer to me tyvm ^^ if I mei ren yao you've to take care of me next time!

then again, sometimes I really think I'm damn stupid )':
Person A: all your logics are well, pretty screwed up.
Person B: you're just weird.

the bad thing is.. I dnt disagree with them FML.

2011-07-09T23:34:00.003+08:00

WHY MY BB HAS NO LEME LEME?!?!?! )':

Draco Malfoy;
Closest green item to you.

well currently I'm sitting on my gorgor's bed and his bedsheet is green, so that is it (:
or a tissue box on his study table.

sometimes, I wonder if I should be happy that people need me when they are lonely & needy.
well, does it mean that when I'm lonely and needy, they will also be there for me?
I'd choose to give them the benefit of doubt but.. currently,
I dnt believe in anyone, I dnt believe in love, I dnt believe in anything.

Sometimes, fate is just.. too amazinnnnnng (':

soooooo just now I was watching this show with Mama Au..
the little girl who has been living in a kampong with her grandpa is going to leave him
& join her mum in the States. I really really hate that, I hate goodbyes,
I hate to think that next time when I'm old everyone's going to leave me.
so, actually I dnt think I want to live till my 70s or 80s, too old too long.

really dnt get why I'm permanently tired, dnt like my body sometimes )':
I need more family time )': sometimes it's really hard to juggle between friends& family,
you can't really prioritize because both are equally important?!

alright R, I'm glad you always understand and thanks for being there (':

2011-07-08T10:48:00.003+08:00

Tadaaaa! I foresaw myself not blogging v often in the future &..
I dnt want my one and only very loyal smelly insect blog reader to be sad,
so I'm going to update pretty often now! (: (:

SKYPARK LATER!!!!!!!!!!!! my virgin trip up there!
heehee hope Ahpoh/Ah-po is going to row boat later.. row row row your boat.

ohyeah my spelling really sucks, my alr-very-lousy English is just unsalvageable.. )':
that day I didn't knw how to spell 'volunteerily', yes it's wrong it's 'voluntarily',
a short boy corrected me ): ohwell, I used Giddy in replace of Greedy, what's worse?

I think I mentioned before right, I really like pictures that are nice/pretty/cool,
like the one above (: the photographer deserves a hug, or many many hugs that I will her at the airport, possibly some H2O + Nacl for her too (': Pingponggggg ♥

Hermione Granger;
A subject you know a lot about. (:

well I would say Chemistry because I'm really interested in it? I used to dream to be a chemist hahaha then I thought of the chances of me exploding the lab! so I would say Chemistry? then again, my Chinese is really good in my very honest opinion so... it would be a battle between the two ;D okay, putting my ego aside, I would say Idk? I'm still hunting for one.. (:

2011-07-07T11:46:00.006+08:00

Ron Weasley;
Something you’re afraid of.

can it be many many things?! I'm afraid of.. Goodbyes, People dying, Falling in love..
there isn't really anything can anyone can do can scare me, because.. what scares me the most is my emotions. I'm only affected by myself, I would say. soooooo, actually I'm most afraid of the inner monster in me, my inner desires. Something that Idk if I can control well.

wait, I think I'm most afraid of not being the one in control.
I can't control who's going to leave me, who is going to die, who I'm going to love and sometimes I can't control my emotions. I do have evil thoughts at times and I can't control them.

everything comes in a package, if you love somebody, you've to love everything about him/her. you fall in love with them because of who they are, not who you want them to be. soooooooooooo, dnt try to change them. what if you really dislike one item in the package? if that one item is enough to affect your liking for the package, then I guess you better change your mind.

TODAY IS SUSHI + FROYO DAY CAN I GET ANY HAPPIER ^^
aight, I hate the fact that I'm constantly happily eating )':

2011-07-06T22:08:00.006+08:00

Harry Potter;
Tell about a scar on your body.

A scar on the back on my hand. I was burnt by an iron when I was 6 (:
when my Godma was ironing clothes, I just placed my hand below the metal bars thing.. for FUN hahaha. I dozed off & my Godma didn't see my small hand and placed the iron back to the metal bars thing then.. UH OH! Actually I've alot of scars but this is the stupidest one ^^

Joooooochiat today! (: I realised I really love doing things like this,
walking around, seeing things, exploring, sweating..
I should be born be a kid of the 70s or 80s I think I'll love the life a lot back then.
I think I dnt belong to the 90s! okay weird thoughts again..
then again someone told me 'if you are not weird then you're not you..' (':

my mood is like this, ultimate roller coaster it's scary hahahaha.
yesterday I was a little sad but today I'm so happy! feeling all loved again (:
I figured out that I just need some, reassurance, then everything's good!
being egoistic is one thing, being insecure is another thing, no one says they can't exist together.
Soooo, I was asking someone 'shit will someone think that I am some si camwhore?'
he said: 20 years later those people will stare into the mirror, looking @ their saggy face & regret, 'why didn't I take more photos of my young and pretty face 20 years ago?'
I love my friends who say meaningful stuff like this to me (:

anyway if I want to follow my plan, I've to get married @ 25 and give birth at 26!
now everything seems impossible because I'll be half way through my post grad!
recently I keep thinking about family/marriage and everything..
a tad too taxing on my puny brain [: thank god for my Hobbit friend/pbbf/whoever..
everything seems so much better ^^

trying to appreciate everything and everyone (':
must treasure everything; well, before I lose them, or they lose me. (:

2011-07-05T20:14:00.003+08:00

No one can change a person, but a person can be the reason someone changes ♥

maybe someone will change you, but the person is not going to be me..
two persons that are too similar cannot fall together, okay stereotypes!
but that's what I really think hehehe ^^

today was filled with nostalgia.. well that's why I hate packing my stuff hahaha :D
so there's this notebook that K gave me when I was sec 2 before he left for Aussie,
then it was J who left me his racquet & promised he'd come back every term..
then a lot of cards/letters/photos, I like memories, bits and pieces of them.
but memories reminds me of who's not exactly in my life anymore,
sooooooooo meh? I feel like going somewhere far, far away (':
My memory rests, but never forgets what I lost.

anyway I had my first ever babysitting experience last weekend! with Jazzy and Rina!
it was.. fun (: only when the kids dnt throw tantrums and cry..
or trying get my attention! feel like strangling them sometimes HAHA.
they are 3 and 6, from Perth!!! the younger one can cry up to 10 times a day HAHA
I've new mature thoughts again, next time I want to be an awesome mother (':
if I knw I can't take care of them properly, I'll rather not give birth to them.

okay came across this I think it's kinda cool! I'm not a HP fan but I gonna do this ^^

Harry Potter - Tell about a scar on your body.
Ron Weasley - Something you’re afraid of.
Hermione Granger - A subject you know a lot about.
Draco Malfoy - Closest green item to you.
Severus Snape - Your favorite Alcoholic beverage.
Rubeus Hagrid - Your favorite animal.
Luna Lovegood - Something about you other people find weird.
Neville Longbottom - Your favorite flower.
Nimphodorah Tonks - Something you would change about your appearance.
Fred and George Weasley - The last prank you pulled on someone, or someone pulled on you.
Voldemort - If you were to make a Horcrux, it would be…
Moaning Myrtle - The last thing to make you cry.

2011-06-27T23:27:00.005+08:00

urgent need to cut my fringeeeeee ): it's getting way too long/much for me to handle!

so I've been talking to some people who can really make my day (:
it feels good when someone you used to talk to everyday suddenly calls just to catch up
and they actually remember all the details ^^
I miss them, but I knw it's hard for them to be back into my life again,
because things are different now. your life can't remain the same forever,
there are different phases, in each phase, you knw new people.
you make new friendships, and lose some, it's inevitable?
well, if you have friends who last through every phase of your life,
cherish them because they are your soul mates (: (:

so I was having this conversation with someone and he insisted that 'love fades..'
so it got me thinking a little? the current me believe in that (skeptical much yes!)
but part of my heart believes in meeting the right person (:
well despite being cynical and skeptical, I still have a little faith in fairy tales :D

I'm really tired! I sat in the car for about 12 hours just yesterday and today )':
madness! and I freaking hate traffic jam..
maybe I shouldn't learn driving because I can only drive when there's no jam..
I love sitting/sleeping in the car when there's traffic jam ^^

anyway I wanna save up a lot of Kachingkaching $_$
I want to go to Mauritius! pretty sky pretty sea pretty beach I like (:
as well as backpacking in Europe again! heehee
this time maybe to the more exotic parts of Europe, I wanna leave my footprints everywhere!

really, you just dnt knw how determined I am.
nothing, nothing can bring me down. nothing can stop me from achieving my dreams.
even if I've to take the tougher path, I will do it (':
I dnt think settling for anything else will make my life happy?
I wouldn't say I can't do without it, but I knw I wouldn't be happy without it.
because living in regrets is what losers do, not what I do.

SCHOOL PLEASE START ALR ): I CAN WAIT NO MORE HEHE.

2011-06-26T01:35:00.003+08:00

we're all trying too hard to define ourselves;;;

I figured out that I'm not the most skeptical person afterall (: hehehe.

3 more days of work and I'm officially as free as a blue bird!
I've been quite ~in love! with blue colour recently, navy/baby blue/turquoise yadayadaaa,
I guess they make me feel peaceful? like looking at the sky, sort of like calm me down?
well black/white/grey are still my favourite series of colours hehehe ^^

so recently I've been rather, unhealthy?! I've been sick and stuff,
like physically unwell and as well as mentally unstable, wait I meant emotionally.
Major dislike for my angsty side! need to control my temper and learn not snap at people (':
still trying! well I guess this is part of my learning process, learning to be a better person!

cheeeesh I want to go paddle tmr, but since it's a Sunday I'm really really lazy )':
hahaha there's a price to pay to be lean and healthy looking!

2011-06-22T23:40:00.002+08:00

I'm so frustrated/angry/irritated/depressed/helpless )':
I really dnt knw how independent you actually want me to be?
and seriously I knw I can survive if no one's helping me,
but I'm just frustrated that none of you seemed like you care?
I knw I've been settling things on my own but just showing some concern doesn't hurt does it?
okay maybe it's just me being extremely whiny and pms-y,
but I think I've had enough of this and I just feel like giving up.
what's the point of keep going on..?!?!!! I hope I can just disappear to somewhere far, far away.

okay what's with this disgusting negativity.

2011-06-20T21:42:00.002+08:00

Rafael Nadal on tv right now teeheehee ^^
I always like French Open and Wimbledon! they are my favourite grandslams!
well cos they are the slowest and fastest surface and more unique..
and in Wimbledon everyone wears white! so traditional and classy (:
okay everything leads to this video! moving around the court with his short legs (Y)

so yesterday I was eating cereal prawn, okay I was eating the cereal instead of the prawns.
I really dnt understand the ~good~ of prawn because I hate peeling prawns.
and it's not worth dirtying your hands because prawns aren't exactly THAT nice,
I rather squid/fish/clam~ OKAY EXCEPT HARGOW ^^

CAN'T WAIT FOR WORK TO END/SCHOOL TO START )':
life's getting really really really boring and if school doesn't start,
there's really going to be a beeeeeeg hole in my wallet )':

I've had enough (': so this time, I'm going to give up on you first (':

2011-06-17T00:54:00.005+08:00

sometimes, I wish some things can be more definite.
like, yes? or no. I just want an answer, even if it is the answer that I do not want.
I dnt like things to fall into the grey area, absolute dislike for uncertainties.

anyway, I'm drinking some bacteria cultured tea made by my mummy.
sounds like some healthy freak family but no, I eat KFC :D
I think I must have a serious talk with my tummy,
Here you go 'come on duzi, be good and I will feed you chilli crab and stingray.' (:
yeah I like chilli crab, okay dnt have to be chilli crab, just crab will do ^^I
I've a vvv inexpensive mouth, fishballs makes me happy (:

okay currently, 1/2/4/7/8/9/10/11/12/13/15 makes me happy :D
especially Eight and Nine heeheehee. ^^

soooooo, I was talking to this person (an adult) and I figured out pretty much about life.
well not THAT much, but she told me that she didn't marry the guy that she loved/still loves.
quote 'when we realized that we love each other, it was too late.'
so cliché, but some people really have no choice? life doesn't give many people chances.
daddy didn't have the chance to enter university.. some people are forced to study what they dnt like, just to get into a field with good job prospects.. LIFE IS SO UNFAIR.

nice photography makes me happy ^^v seeing pretty things/pretty people makes me happy!
when I'm richer I want to get myself all sort of cameras
so that I can take down every pretty moment of my life (:

I want to go for mission trips when I'm older and have the ability to contribute to the world!
or do you call it Ocip for free thinkers like me hahaha (:
I wanna go Vietnam/Cambodia/Chiangmai/India/Sabah/Myanmar/Africa!

OKAY, BODYBUILDERS ARE SUCH TURN-OFFS.

he doesn't even need to use pillow when he sleeps please..

2011-06-16T04:37:00.005+08:00

soooooo many things i want to feast on...

padthai, tomyum soup, sambal kangkung, subway- meatball + hearty italian + lettuce + honey mustard + mayo, boxmaster!, mos teriyaki chicken burger, mr bean chocolate/cheese pancake, fft carrot cake, shredded chicken porridge, rojak with alot of youtiaos, fried prawn mee, grilled stingray!!!, moist chocolate cake, hawaiian pizza, orangi-yo froyo, salmon sashimiiiii, tako balls, tori q grilled chicken stick, fishballs, fishsoup beehoon @ thomson, meehoonkueh, banmian!!!
these are pretty much all my favourite food (: (: (:

too bad i dnt think my tummy, at the current state, is accepting any of them ):

2011-06-15T12:40:00.003+08:00

Seriously just freaking kill me alr please ):
I can't stand pain without a reason, it's like the stupidest thing that can ever happen.
well I rather fall down or sprain my ankle or cut myself or whatever,
anything is better than this, my pain tolerant is pretty high but
THIS STUPID UNKNOWN PAIN IS JUST, KILLERZ ARRRRRGHHH.
*thank god for bbm conversation that always makes my day ^^*

anyway I think my dad is really really cool ^^
he made this corner of the garden a mini plantation! he planted a few types of vege there!
& there's my favourite Kangkung! my infinity love for Kangkung.. with sambal chilli ^^
MAKE IT EXTRA SPICY! hahahha Pingpong and I went to Porn's (: (:
which had really nice Thai Stir-fried Kangkung EXTRA SPICY.

it's unusual for me to be so.. low on energy. hate the idea of Fair, Frail and Weak.
oh and I like the idea of nature! & Melwee's mother loves me for that (:

sometimes I wonder, why are people so nice to me? when I'm not even half as nice..
then sometimes I wonder why do I actually wonder about such things?
just appreciate those people please! before they leave you.
with my forever theory I insist there no one is here for me 'forever' (:

An act chio picture of me wahahahah :D

seriously, LET KAKA LEAVE ALR )': you're freaking wasting a talent,
and since you alr have Ozil just let him shine somewhere else please ):
'I know I have not matched the expectations of the club, the fans or the press, and I would really like that to happen at Real Madrid, so my wish is to stay there as a personal goal,'
THEN AGAIN, I dnt want my favourite player to play for my 2nd hatest club, aka the BLUES.
why do I get frustrated over such things hahhahaa :D cos I'm weird.

that's why I said, love isn't reliable (: well, at least for now.